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Own writings

A different picture - part 2

She was sleeping. Apparently a calm and strenghtening sleep. But something was on its way from deep inside. And after fumbling in blindness through memories and unsolved enigmas, she was suddenly standing in the front yard of her parent’s home. Over the hills she looked across to the harbour where her father and brothers boat was. Something distraught came over her. A shivering, as of the coldness from an open door you barely can look in through. The boat was there. But in the same moment it blew up, and in a second the boat turned upside down. It could as well be a water drop on a leaf in the morning breeze. She shouted. And then she run. It was anxiety without thoughts. A three minutes race --- ahead to the unbeliavable. But the goal was clear. And when she in the end was standing at the quay, everything became totally quiet. There were nothing to see. Everything was empty. Cold sea. Black and silent it was there, but with a strange, secret reflection.

Whilst she was standing there, looking out on the water, she had absolutely no possibility to explain her feelings.. No words existed. Then she suddenly saw a white box in the sea. That was the hope. A resque float. Oh..so there was a way to get saved after all.. The time she is working with getting it up of the sea is none existent. It’s the most important job she has done in her whole life, and no lack of strength shall stop her from getting this heavy thing up from the sea. She manage to drag it into the end of the quay. At last.. She was so relieved. Now it was just to open it. But - No..it was no resque float. It was.. . oh.. for a short moment she wanted to throw it out in the sea again, but she had to get an answer.

It was a white coffin in front of her. She knew very well what kind. And when she opend it, she saw her father lying there. Just in the moment when she was about to say; Dad is dead – he suddenly rise up. But he has a mysterious glow in his eyes. Something she has never seen before. He looks straight out in the air in front of him, as if he is looking at something far away, outside her sight. He walks straight through her, but she feels it just as a stroke of a feather. On to the other edge of the quay he walks.. and outside it. But instead of falling down, as the force of gravity would make him to – a white cloud comes under his feet and lift him up. The cloud changes colour to pink and azur blue, and slowly it covers more and more of his body.. lightly, like chiffon. At the end theres only a shadow in the middle of this clear, bright light. Then its all gone. And she is standing there. Alone on the quay. With a feeling of gratitude and calmness.

But that is as long as she stands there. As in bed there is another girl. She can not manage to drag herself away, but know its time. And after a break through that feels harder than being born again, she wakes up in dizziness. Then the tears come. A deep, heavy cry, coming from far away. A cry that can not be stopped, but are telling that this is not a dream. It is not as it shall be.. not at all. But its not a dream. She is crying for hours. She has rised up now, are walking around in the rooms half unconscious, feeling more dead than alive. A heavy truth is slowly showing through the veil of dreams…..

-own writings-

© AriZonaMoon 2008