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Own writings

A different picture - part 1

She remembers it clearly. The night she couldn’t sleep. It was the night before her parents should come on a weekend visit. She had gone to bed for the evening when she heard the sound. It was the front door that opened. In from outside there came a person she knew well. She recognized the steps. He went further into the inner hall, and then he started to walk the stairs to the 2nd floor where she was. It was when he went the steps in the stairs she started to cry. They told her so much.. way too much… It was the last time he came, and he knew it. He had come to terms with what was about to happen, and didn’t feel any sorrow for his own fate. But he wanted to tell it to her. So she knew. This was the best way to do it. She could digest it in peace, without any words spoken.

He stopped outside her bedroom door. She didn’t hear more. But it was enough. How could she manage to meet this inconceivable? She knew that his physical body was not there – not standing outside her bedroom door. He shouldn’t come before the next day. Still he was there. And it was not any easy message he had to tell.

It took her a long while to cry herself calm again, and at the end she fell asleep of pure exhaustion. When the morning came, she didn’t think about it anymore. She had hided it in a special, closed room, where no one had entry… No one else than him.

Then they came. Mum and Dad. They should stay there from Friday to Sunday, and it all started out normal. But also very nice of course, since she had visit of her family. But after few hours things were not as normal anymore. Maybe it looked like it for others, but there was a vibrant, clearly felt atmosphere that couldn’t be explained. And little by little she became aware of that she at all moments was sitting close to her father. With the kitchen table, in the lounge, also at the same chair as him. And they held each others hands. Yes, not that strange, of course, as they had a close and good relationship. But it was not usual to sit together like this. It was natural only right then.

During one of the days, the two of them was sitting alone in the lounge. They sat right beside each other in the sofa, and again they were holding each others hands, as if there were some kind of energy that should move unblocked between them.

He said; “There are not much time left now, my dear.”

“No, I know that dad.”

“Yes. I don’t know in what way it’s going to happen. I thought it was over the other day. A big stone came through the air, and I had no way to get out of the way. But strangely enough it went just beside my head. So it was not going to happen like that.”

“Why do you tell this to me, dad? Why is it me that have to know?”

“It’s only you who can bear it. I could never have told it to your mum, she would have gone crazy. It’s better for her to wait. But you are calm. You understand more than the others. It’s just how it is.”

It was a strange chat. It went on as if they were talking about the weather. Totally natural, without any big words. It was only a confirmation of something they both knew. The unavoidable was soon to come….

-own writings-

© AriZonaMoon 2008